The Joy of Shopping (and thoughts on maintenance)

I had brunch today in the Meat Packing District, then walked around with a friend, going in and out of a few shops. One of our stops was the Diane von Furstenberg store. I've wanted a dress from there for years, but they never fit before. After I got banded, I passed that store one day and promised myself that I would buy myself a DVF dress when I got to goal. Guess what? That happened today.

I don't have a photo of the dress, but it's great -- it's a sheath dress in "deep geranium" (almost a fuschia). It fits perfectly and will be great to wear to work. I'll post a photo when I wear it. Wait!! I just realized that it's nearly a dead ringer for the Joan Holloway dress I posted recently!

One thing that I've been wanting to write about is maintenance. I hit my goal of 155 pounds on April 5th, which is already four months ago. Wow -- time has flown by! I still consider 145 to be my aspirational goal, but am OK with staying where I am. I haven't lost any weight now for over a month, but that is fine (I am at 151 right now).

So far, maintenance is actually a lot easier than I thought it would be. I'm at the point where it is harder for me to lose, so there is no risk of me getting too thin. My band is open enough that I can eat comfortably, but not so open that I can overeat. I actually love being at this level because when my band is tighter, I actually don't make as good of food choices, since it's harder to eat most kinds of protein. I don't do anything too much differently from what I did as I was losing, it's just that now my calorie intake is in line with what I need to maintain this particular weight.

My secret Maintenance weapon! The bathroom scale . . .

The most important thing I do to keep myself in check is to just get on the scale every morning. It's such an easy, simple thing to do. Every morning, I hop on the scale and see where I am, weight-wise. That tells me how mindful I need to be that day about following the bandster rules and making good food and exercise choices. Also, because I look at the scale every day, there is no way several pounds are going to creep up on me without me knowing about it. This is such a ridiculously simple thing to do, especially given how incredibly helpful it is to keep me focused. It's not hard anymore to make the right food choices, and I actually really like the way working out makes me feel and how it's changed my body -- and that provides a really good incentive for me to keep working out.

This simple act of getting on the scale every day is a HUGE departure from my behavior pre-band. I used to avoid the scale like the plague. Then, when I finally decided to weigh myself, I'd have to psych myself up to it for a few days. Eventually, I'd cringe (with my eyes half-squeezed shut), get on the scale and look at the (always higher) number. Then I'd feel terrible about myself, my weight, and how fat I'd let myself get. Sometimes I'd diet for a while, but I'd always find myself back at square one a few months later. Well, that phase is over now, thank God.

I'm also really surprised to still be getting so much joy over feeling good about my weight and body. It is just so nice to be able to walk around comfortably in the heat of summer, to go into stores and have them actually have my size, and to like what I see in the mirror.

Sometimes I wonder why I didn't realize a long time ago how good all of this would feel. Maybe if I'd known, I could have broken the weight gain cycle before it got too out of hand. At the same time though, I realize that it's only because I let things get so bad -- because I hit my personal rock bottom -- that I am able to really appreciate how good I have it now. I expect that if I hadn't experienced this whole journey that I'd probably look at myself and focus on my imperfections, instead of just feeling really happy and grateful to have come as far as I have. So, I'm grateful to have experienced all of this because I really like where I am right now.