HAPPY SECOND BANDIVERSARY!!

Exactly two years ago today, I had lap band surgery. The past two years have been amazing, and I have not questioned my decision to get banded for even a moment. It's been such a novel, freeing and incredible experience to actually feel GOOD about my weight and my body for two whole years in a row. I feel like I've been freed from prison -- the food prison. . and the fat prison, too.

On this momentous occasion, I want to share some thoughts and observations with you. . .

I'm counting my band-related blessings. Here are the first ten things that come to mind:

1. I am strong and fit now.

2. I can run, whereas I couldn't when I was at my heaviest.

3. My feet and back don't hurt anymore.

4. I feel good, both physically and mentally.

5. I am proud of achieving my goal and making this work.

6. I no longer feel any shame, self-loathing or disgust about how my body looks.

7. I like how I look, and I'm forgiving of any flaws I may have.

8. I really like the extra attention and special treatment that I get now.

9. It is a pleasure to go shopping now.

10. I have plenty of wiggle room on airplanes, in canoes, and anywhere else I choose to put my substantially smaller and cuter bee-hind.

Exhibit A: My substantially smaller and cuter bee-hind at the US Open in August 2010

Is the thrill gone after two years? Do you just forget about the band after a while, and does being at goal just seem normal or ordinary?

The thrill isn't gone for me. I so often think about how grateful and lucky I am to have found this tool to help me with my weight. I am still thrilled by NSVs all the time. Finding that I fit into a Tracy Reese size 8 (!) dress recently was a big one. Feeling tiny when I'm on a date is a new good one too!

SVs (scale victories) are hard to come by now that I'm in the low 150s. I have not lost even an ounce since July 6th -- more than three months ago! But, I've been taking spin classes and doing yoga throughout the intervening time. . and, in taking my measurements for this post, I was really surprised to learn that I lost 5.9 inches since July 6th!! Wow!! That includes half an inch from each thigh, half an inch from each calf, and a whole inch off my hips!! (I can't stress enough how important it is to take your measurements as early as possible during this process.)

Number of Inches and Pounds Lost?

During the past two years, I have lost 79.2 pounds (going from 230 to 150.8) and . . . . . (insert drumroll).............

50.45 inches -- that is 4.2 FEET -- from my body!! WOW!!!

I can hardly believe it when I try on my Jared pants and see how enormous they are on me. I actually have a very hard time wrapping my head around the fact that I used to fill them out.

This photo was taken in April 2010

What did this loss cost you?
Lap Band Gal recently wrote a bandiversary post that I loved. One of the things she did was to calculate how much she paid, per pound, for her lap band surgery and follow up visits. Like me, she was self-pay. I haven't kept exact track of what I've spent, but it's in the neighborhood of $9,500, all told. That's about $120.25 per pound.

It sounds like a lot when you put it like that. But $9,500 was such a small price to pay to get my life back, to feel good about myself, to be healthy and fit, to fit into any seat comfortably, to be able to wear regular-sized clothing, to be free from hating myself for my weight, free from foot pain and back pain -- and the shame of having to see old friends and knowing they would see how much weight I'd gained.

Do I miss anything about my pre-band life?
Not really. OK, there is ONE thing that I kind of miss. . . taking a big ole bite out of a juicy burger that has pickles, a bun, tomato, ketchup and mustard on it. Yet, even though my mouth is watering at the thought of that bite, I honestly couldn't care less about giving it up. I would never trade 80 pounds for that bite.

How was Year Two different from Year One?

Year One was all about seeing new numbers on the scale and learning what worked well with my band. I felt incredible that entire year and, for the first time in my life, I spent an entire year feeling happy and grateful about my weight and how I was managing my

personal battle of the bulge! That feeling has carried through -- I still feel fantastic about that. In fact, I've felt downright joyous on the weight front ever since I began this process, even when I had other stresses in my life.

During Year One, I dropped the bulk of my extra weight -- 63 pounds. I am 5'6, and that took me from 230 to 167 lbs, leaving 12 more to get to my goal of 155. I only lost 16 pounds this entire year (taking me to 151). But, they were really significant pounds. They took me from being slightly fluffy to having a reasonably rocking body for a 39 year old! Hee hee!

I got serious about exercise about six months into Year One, but I really dug in during Year Two. It is really a part of my life now, and I'm in even better (!) shape now than I was on my first bandiversary. And, because of its effects, I actually like body parts, like my bootie, which I'd hated for my entire life up to now. Even my legs are shaping up these days! I wear clothing that shows off my figure now (within the confines of good taste, naturally!). And, my clothing size ranges from an 8 to a 10. (I started at size 20, 14W, 1X).

On other levels, Year One was about getting over my breakup with PP, and about holding on to my job during the recession. Year Two was about getting used to my new body, and pushing myself to be physically stronger and more fit. It was also the time of my nearly year-long rebound relationship with C. During Year Two, I also worked at finding ways to build my practice at work despite the depressed economy, and on branching out socially and making increasing efforts to do new things.

Comparison from July 25, 2010. Click here to see a bigger version.

What an amazing road this has been, and continues to be. I wish there was a word to convey how grateful I feel to have found a way to free myself from the fat prison. How about grateful to the 10th power?? :)

What will Year Three Be Like?

As I begin Year Three, my initial impression is that this year is going to be about living my life to the fullest. Part of that will include continuing with my exercise and setting new fitness challenges for myself. I am seriously thinking about running a 10K next year. If I get tired of spin class, I'm going to try Physique 57, which I understand is a fantastic workout.

I feel ready for a new relationship and am really excited about the possibility of falling in love. I really want to plan to hike the Inca trail, or to do some other vacation that is physically demanding enough that I never would have done it at my start weight.

For Year Three, I don't care if I lose any more weight (not that 2-5 more pounds lost wouldn't be fab!), but I care very much about maintaining and keeping up my fitness level. Honestly, maintaining has turned out to be much easier than I expected. I know that working out 3 times a week (on average) is key to that for me. It also lets me do things like eat ice cream or cookies when I want (in moderate portions), without the scale going up. I'm lucky that my band tightness doesn't fluctuate too much, and I'm at a very comfortable fill level that works well for me. Weighing myself every day is also key to maintenance for me. If the scale is up, I forego the cookie or get in an extra workout. If it's down, I eat what I like, within reason.

I have spent a lot of time working on myself -- physically, emotionally and intellectually -- during these last two years, and I really like where I am. I also love every single one of you who I have connected with through the bandster blogosphere, as well as everyone in my day to day life who has supported me through this process. You are all such an important part of what has helped me to stay the course and keep focused, positive and encouraged. This blog has been an incredible tool and resource for me, and I am honored that you have let me share it with you.