I've been in a little bit of a funk since my last post. The whole Erica thing was really disappointing, and I was mulling over how to handle the situation. Ultimately, she wound up calling me at work and I picked up, since I didn't recognize the number. Anyway, I let her know that I was bothered by her deliberately misleading me and by hiding the fact that she'd been to the reception. Funny enough, she told me that the reason she hid it was because she "felt guilty." So, it wasn't about protecting my feelings ultimately, after all. (As if I'd be upset that she went in the first place. .) Lame, lame, lame. This is not the behavior of a true friend.In other news, I broke things off with Chris the week before last. He just didn't seem to be able to handle the possibility of moving and dating me at the same time. Basically, he still wanted to spend a ton of time with me, but he rolled back the physical side of things (which had barely even gone anywhere in the first place) to the point that I was left quesitoning whether he was even attracted to me! He'd be very affectionate when we were out, but the minute we were alone together. . . screeching halt. This was very different from how he was pre-job-opportunity, and I really did not like the change. We had a very open discussion about it, and his intentions sounded good, but I just don't think that's normal behavior. He doesn't even have an offer yet... not to mention that I don't know any guy who would be THIS conservative, especially when things seemed so good on the chemistry front at the outset. Anyway, since he is not capable of going with the flow, and I was feeling slighted, annoyed and frustrated, I decided to just stop seeing him entirely and focus on meeting someone else.
So. . . I've been pouting for the last week or so, but am now feeling better. For me, I really laid low this weekend, and it was just what I needed. Don't worry that I'm turning into a hermit or anything... I met up with friends for drinks, dinner and a party at the Bulgarian Consulate where a friend's jazz was playing on Friday and went to my favorite spa with my friend Hayley on Saturday for luxury mani/pedis. But, after that, I haven't left the house since! I cleaned, did laundry, stayed in bed and watched Masterpiece Classics on Netflix, and finally got out of my pjs around 3 p.m. to take a bath. Much better!
Now I'm going to pop on some clothes and get a massage at a super cheap, semi-suspect-looking Chinese massage place near me that I go to periodically! Fingers crossed I don't get bed bugs or put next to someone getting a happy ending! KIDDING!! (Kind of. .) LOL
18 comments:
I was wondering about you, I have seen you around commenting, but not so much blogging! I am glad you are starting to feel better, and it sounds like it was for the best to break things off now before they really got complicated! Enjoy your massage!
Hope you get out of the funk soon. Sometimes I feel like "funk" is okay - we need a few days like that to re-evaluate and re-awaken. You are beautiful and worthy of true love. Don't settle for anything less.
you crack me up a Happy Ending ;) nothing like a good massage to get out of a funk! Chris doesn't sound worthy of you.
I'm glad you had the chance to talk to Erica...and BTW, her excuse was very disappointing. I'm glad you got the chance to chill out. I agree with everyone else so far. Don't settle, you deserve the best.
It sounds like you have thoroughly recharged your batteries and are raring to start a new phase in your life! Hope you enjoyed the massage!
I'm glad you're un-funkifying. I hope you really are and not just saying you are. I have to say, I really admire you for knowing what you want out of a relationship and just not settling for anything less. So I will picture you, walking confidently, fabulously, and skinnily, through the streets of NYC decorated for x-mas. Looking goooood! ;)
I think you've had every right to feel down - but a day relaxing sounds like a good way to feel better. Hope your massage went well and there were surprises!
LOL on the Chinese massage...I go to a place like that sometimes and I always wonder the same thing.
I know you will meet someone wonderful. Everyone used to say that to me and I would say yeah right. I can't believe I actually did (on match believe it or not). So just get back out there with your rocking self!
LOL on the Chinese massage...I go to a place like that sometimes and I always wonder the same thing.
I know you will meet someone wonderful. Everyone used to say that to me and I would say yeah right. I can't believe I actually did (on match believe it or not). So just get back out there with your rocking self!
Take as long as you want shaking off that funk... especially if you are treating yourself sweetly and meditating over the issues at hand. You are a strong person and so wonderful. Don't de-value yourself, make sure you are getting what you're giving... Or at least close... I mean, it's hard to imagine a friend as thoughtful as you but in a city as big as NYC, you should be able to find one, or at least make sure Erika becomes one.
I hear ya on the funky stuff... blah. Hope your weekend really helped and that your massage was great! Have an awesome week :)
Sounds like a lot of disappoint all around. Glad you're coming out of it...a massage is just the ticket (even at a suspect type place. LOL).
Ive been there...and no how shitty it can be to be in a funk! A nice bath always makes me feel better! My husband would love a massage with a happy ending! LOL!
Good funk treatment-- going to bed with some movies, pajama moping and then gradually pulling out of it with a nice NYC shady massage.
From the outside looking in, can I tell you how glamorous your life is in its appearance ? I am not sure if that is any consolation... but sometimes when I get down, I try to see my own life through someone else's eyes (it helps me see all the awesome things I've got going that I just 'take for granted')...
I hope some perspective helps too.
You are really a terrific woman who deserves the right guy who can handle your success and confidence.
One day, he will come... in the meantime, enjoy the bounty of glamour and play in NYC!!
Now that things are in the open...Remember that tune from days gone by..."Always Walk on the bright side of the Street..Which is where ever you are! Keep smiling and keep your real friends close. The not too true friends at arms length You will come through this with a win and a smile on your face.
You'll get your groove back soon, hon, and I am proud of you for doing what is best for you and moving on. Sorry for the situation with your friend (been there done that) but I agree with you totally. enjoy the time to yourself and the spa treatments. Sometime you just need to get back to basics and relax!
I didn't get a chance to read blogs yesterday and so am just seeing this. And I feel the need to let you know I'm thinking of you. I think you are very wise to be evaluating this friendship with Erica, that certainly sounds fair-weather'ish to me. I'm not sure "friend" is a term that can be applied to her, but rather acquaintance. Sure doesn't help, though, that you are a friend to her. I hate that you are having to evaluate this friendship. Never easy to move on. I have found comfort in the notion that friends come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. And sometimes we do just have to move on...
As for Chris, I think you did the wise thing there, as well. Oddness. It is most definitely the healthy (and therefore difficult) thing to do in cutting it off and moving on. I love that you respect yourself as you do! Such class!
Finally, I have often wondered if you ever have down weekends. Your life is so glamarous and just so unlike mine in many ways. I could not exist without down weekends. So I am quite happy to hear that you just did a you-thing this weekend. Personally, I find such peace in me-time. I can never not have those weekends!
Ive been following the whole "Erica" saga; and I just wanted to point out that sometimes even good friends make mistakes. Its not justifying what she did; but remember that all of us who follow your blog dont really know the relationship you guys truely have. We get a glimps. I see a lot of harsh words being said on here about her from those of us who dont really know her or what her intentions were, or what your friendship really is. If she is really ashamed of her actions and truely sorry, maybe its not worth throwing the relationsip away. I think it was good you picked up the phone and got to tell her exactly how that made you feel. Just my two cents. Real friends are not easy to come by. And if we threw away relationships every time someone made a mistake, we'd all be pretty lonely. Of course, if after you evaluate it, you feel like she isnt a real friend, then by all means move on.
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